"Fireballs"

You don't get much luckier than this. We asked everyone they knew to invite all the guys they knew to show up at Dwyer's Irish Pub for our shoot. We then picked a random guy, Larry, to play a major role. He could've sucked big time. But he was great. Must've been a leprachaun looking out for us.

"Postage Paid"

Val has been a radio personality in Buffalo for quite some time, formerly at 103.3 The Edge, and now at Mix 104.1. And this is gonna sound icky, but if I called a sex phone operator (which I wouldn't) and Val worked there (which she doesn't), I totally wouldn't ask for my money back.

"Fireballs"

Sarah heard that a film was being made about her burlesque troupe, Eye Candy, and she was like "Cool". Then she found out that she was in the film, and she was like "What?" But she was great. And that scene where she's stuffing tissues down her top? Her idea. That's good stuff.

"The Consultants"
"Hold The Onions"

Greg is a relative of Jerry MacKay...wait, there I go with that whole third person thing again...he's my cousin. And listen to this...on the first day of shooting, not knowing anyone, Greg shows up with a t-shirt. The shirt said "taco" on it. The shirt was pink. Get it? That's Greg for ya!

"The Consultants"

For "The Consultants", we needed a black guy. Four, actually. And four white guys, a spanish guy, a Hispanic, an Asian, and a female. Anyway, James was one of our black guys, and he was great. But believe it or not, our biggest problem was finding four white guys. I'm totally serious...they're very elusive.

"Hold The Onions"

In "Hold The Onions", Kathryn plays a good mom. In "Fast Forward" (another short film I worked on), Kathryn plays a mom who's daughter gets killed by an evil old woman. I don't know what kind of mom lets her kid hang out with evil old people. A bad one, probably. Nice job, Kathryn.

"Hold The Onions"

You know "A Christmas Story"? Well Max played Randy in it. Not in the film, but in the theatrical production at Studio Arena Theatre. The film was made like twenty years ago. Max would've needed a time machine to pull that off. Maybe he has a time machine...I never asked him.

"The Consultants"

Nicholas Yu is not an actor; he's actually doing some serious medical research in Buffalo. This means that he's pretty smart. Which is strange, since he agreed to appear in a film directed by a guy he knows casually at the gym. What if we were making a porno? That wouldn't be smart, would it Nick? No, it wouldn't.

"Hold The Onions"

Brendan is an actor; he doesn't work at Anderson's. If he did work there, and I were the manager, I'd fire him. A little girl orders food, and you don't give her the food? What's wrong with you? He's also in a band, but I won't go see him play, because he was such a jerk to that girl at Anderson's.

"On Productivity"

Alaina was in a student film that I saw, a film noir flick, and the narrator says that her character "has legs that go all the way to Japan". If that were true, she could be in the Fantastic Four. Then they could kick out that guy made of bricks. He's totally on steroids. Congress should look into that guy.